Pilates Impact on My Mental Health During Wedding Planning

My Fiance, Austin, and I are Getting Married in June

When I was wedding planning for the first time, I felt like a not-so-“cool girl.” My fiancé and I were crossing items off our checklist as we should have been, but it didn’t feel like “us” most of the time.

Then came COVID-19, and along with it, a postponed wedding. We pushed it back to June 2021 (which feels so far away), but I can’t help feeling that everything is in flux again. While we’re both excitedly looking forward to our nuptials and celebrating with friends and family, we’re also nervous about how the pandemic will disrupt our plans for the second time. It’s honestly been hard to get worked up about anything when there are so many other things happening in the world right now.

Despite this, Austin is an incredible planner and has encouraged me to take on some of the responsibilities and start thinking about some new ideas since we have more time before our actual date! We’ve also agreed that in these uncertain times if things don’t go as planned or if someone misses out on attending due to COVID-19 precautions (or anything else!), it’s OK—we’ll still have each other at the end of the day.

Before we even got engaged, I knew that I wanted to take a more active approach to wed planning this time around.

• Wedding planning is stressful.

• Wedding planning is stressful and it’s important to take care of yourself.

• Wedding planning can be stressful, especially if you are planning more than one.

When I got engaged for the second time back in February, my fiancé and I had already decided that we weren’t going to have a typical wedding. We didn’t want to go over budget or end up with things that we didn’t need just because they were supposed to be part of a traditional wedding. Instead of booking a venue, hiring vendors, and picking out flowers, we wanted to do something different: get married in front of our closest family members along with a few friends at Coney Island on New York City’s boardwalk at sunset.

In October of Last Year, I Set a Goal to Work Out Three Days a Week

In October of last year, I set a goal to work out three days a week. This was partially due to the countless memes about being healthy in 2020 that started circulating in September, but it was also because I needed to destress amid busy wedding planning and wanted to lose a couple of pounds before my January wedding.

I started with an at-home workout program on the fitness app Aaptiv. According to my Apple Watch, I burned roughly 300-400 calories per workout. Through this program, I learned some basic structures like what types of cardio are best for which muscle groups (HIIT is great for your heart), how often you should weight train (every other day is best), and what muscle groups you should be targeting when lifting weights (always warm up with five minutes on the treadmill or bike).

Toward the End of the Month, I Started Texting my Friends about How I was Feeling

I was now communicating with my friends more than ever before, especially when it came to talking about our feelings. My fiancé and I began discussing the new wedding timeline we’d need to share with our parents. As for our workouts, I had a few more “omg I feel so good” moments. It was amazing how much better I felt after exercising physically, but also mentally and emotionally.

By the end of May, almost every conversation with my family members had something to do with planning or feelings related to the wedding being postponed. It became a bit draining (I mean, wouldn’t you be tired of talking about your wedding if it kept getting postponed?).

And while those talks were tough, they were also very important because they allowed us all to get on the same page and reassured us that we were still excited about this celebration in our lives.

At the start of November, Austin and I went to Maui for a Week-Long Vacation

At the start of November, Austin and I went to Maui for a week-long vacation. I had been feeling stressed about planning the wedding and our finances, so it was nice to get away from all that for a little while. We drove around the entire island and visited several waterfalls and beaches that we hadn’t seen before.

We also had some amazing food, which I think is one of the best ways to explore a new place! The restaurants were delicious, but we still like to hit up grocery stores when we travel — it gives you more insight into what locals eat and how they cook. As someone who really likes cooking, it’s me to see how other people cook in different parts of the world.

The day after we returned from our trip, I woke up and opened Instagram to see what my friends were up to.

As a wedding planner and Pilates instructor, I’m usually in pretty good shape. But when my husband Joe and I went to the Bahamas for our honeymoon, I told myself that I was going to take a break from working out.

I vividly remember the precise moment when my good habits started to fall apart. We were sitting on the beach with our travel mugs full of coffee, looking at each other like we’d just won the lottery. “This is heaven,” I thought as I took another sip of coffee. Suddenly, a waiter appeared with a fresh bowl of fruit topped with flaky pastry and drizzled in warm syrup and whipped cream—and it was all for me!

I usually don’t eat dessert or drink alcohol—but this was vacation, so anything goes! As soon as we returned home from our trip, however, something shifted inside me: My body felt heavy and sluggish after indulging in sweets and cocktails every day—not to mention how much weight I’d gained after two weeks’ worth of burgers and fries.

Eight months later…

A regular workout routine is just as important for your mental health as it is for your physical health (if not more so).

I’ve never been one to hit the gym regularly, but I do believe in the benefits of physical activity. The Mayo Clinic states that exercise can be beneficial for anxiety, depression, stress, sleep, and self-confidence. If you feel those things when you’re planning your wedding (and maybe even if you aren’t), working out can help to relieve some of them.

I learned that it’s not a coincidence that I made room for my weekly Pilates classes during this time in my life; a regular workout routine is just as important for your mental health as it is for your physical health (if not more so).